So, there I was, driving home, minding my own business when suddenly, out of nowhere, I see a spider, a huge one, walking down the window of my car. My first reaction was, 'oh, he's on the outside, he'll fall off.' then I looked at it closely and I realized, oh no, it's inside the car!!
Fun fact, I'm scared to death of all bugs. Okay, maybe not scared to death but I don't like them too much. The best way to hear me scream like a little girl is to be a bug, a large one, somewhere in my immediate vicinity.
I'm driving, there is no way for me to pull over to stop, and this spider is slowly walking down my windshield toward me. I'm carefully looking around the car trying to figure out if I can get the spider out of my car while still driving. Yeah, that wasn't going to work so I simply started talking to the spider. "Hello Spider, hope I'm taking you a place you want to go. Say, spider, can you please stay there. . .oh, you're moving again, that's okay I get it, I'd move too if I could . Okay, now you're near my rearview mirror and hey, where did you go? Okay, I can't see you now and you'd think that would be okay but really it's not cause when I could see you I'd know where you are, but now that I can't I'm afraid you might surprise me somehow. Where did you go anyway?"
For the rest of the ride I'm looking at the Windshield wondering where the spider went. I finally pull onto my street and park and only then do I see that the Spider decided to rest on my rearview mirror. I have a choice, leave it there and hope that it doesn't build a web in my car or try to get it out. I didn't really want to kill it, mostly cause it was kind of big and that would have been messy, or find a way to shoo it out.
I look around and find an old parking stub, an old Yahoo map I printed out, and a bunch of other junk. I really need to clean my car. I use the parking stub to sort of herd the spider onto the Yahoo map and, of course, it was then that the spider decided to jump, which caused me to jump and scream and leap out of the car! When I look back into the car, after making sure my heart was not, in fact, on the driver's seat, I see the spider was still on the Yahoo map (maybe he needed to know where he was going?)
I grab the paper and throw it out of my car and onto the ground. The spider fell out of the paper and then just sort of stayed there. Now, I really have a delema, step on it or let it go. I choose to let it go and watched as if scurried away.
It occurred to me, as I was writing this, that Spider in my car would make a great B-52's song! Can't you just hear Fred Schider singing:
There's a spider in my car, oh no!
A spider in my car, good golly!
How did it get there?
Where will it go?
A spider in my car, good god!